Saturday, April 8, 2017

An Attempt at Gratitude

The sun is shining.  The roads are clear.  Both good things.  I was challenged by a sweet friend to write down at least one thing each day that I am thankful for. If you were to look at my blogs over the years, you will see I have written many gratitude posts. As we look cancer square in the face, I feel that showing gratitude will be a weapon in my arsenal used in the war against this hideous disease.
I am going to choose to be thankful.  Full disclosure:  I am mad that I have cancer.  I am sad and I cry a lot.  I don’t know how this is all going to work out.  I feel a burden for my family.  Still, there is much to be thankful for.

The bumper on our bus did its job when the tire hit it.
The owner of the mini van without said tire has insurance.
My sister was enjoying a volleyball weekend with her family minutes off the interstate that we are traveling to get home, so that I could stop to hug and cry.
My littles have had a good weekend.
The bus is quiet.
I get to listen to my son sing tomorrow.
My big girls have great friends.
Bryan can work from home.  He is self-employed. He plans to walk each step with me, but when he doesn’t  work, he doesn’t get paid.
My mom got a texting phone.  I know that sounds silly, but it is kind of a good thing.
I don’t have to worry about meals for my family for three days a week because so many have chosen to love on us so practically.
All my appointments that need to be scheduled are scheduled for this week.
God answers prayer.

I do not write this to portray anything but a feeble attempt to focus on truth. Yes, the truth is that I have a long and difficult road ahead.  The truth also lies in a God who knows all of this and loves me more than I could ever fathom.  Cancer has no power over that fact.  God’s got this and I will hang onto Him for dear life.

4 comments:

Nancy said...

Beautifully written! I'm glad Bryan can work from home :)

Linda Johnson said...

Dear, sweet sister, having walked the road you are starting, I so recommend doing what your friend suggested. God works in peace AND anxiety but we function better in peace. He's got this. Don't let this hurdle steal your joy. Yes, it is a battle, yes, it will dominate your​ schedule but look for the color in all of it. There were many days I was too tired to do much of anything. On a trip home from somewhere, I had to lay in the back seat because I was too tired to sit up. There were days when I looked pale and got extra TLC in a Dairy Queen Blizzard. I enjoyed setting off the Geiger counter when I had a nuclear scan. I asked for a rose tattoo when I had radiation (didn't get it, just dots). In the midst of the exhaustion, God showed me Himself in a very clear and unexpected way.
Be sure Sandy without cancer is a part of your day. It can't be ignored but it does not define you. I'm praying that this is a mere bump on your journey.
And if you need a math teacher, I can do that!! Just get a message to me.
Love and prayers.

Sandy said...

Thank you for offering to teach math. That does weigh on my heart. My 7th graders may need some help, but we shall see how things go. Thank you for your encouragement.

Sandy said...

So am I!!