Thursday, February 5, 2015

Surrender Part 2

We arrived at the courthouse curious as to what would transpire that day, but cautious that nothing would happen.  
Before the judge entered, a decision  was already being worked out.  God had indeed softened the hearts of the biological parents and given them peace to make the toughest decision of their lives.  
As testimony was given, it had become painfully obvious that these children would never be given back to their biological parents.  Anyone who has been entrenched in the foster/adopt system will attest that it is a heartwrenching experience for all involved.  We wanted these children in our home.  It was best for them.  We love them as our own.  Yet, to have them meant someone else had to lose their "rights" to them.  
Children are a gift.  I am so thankful that this mom chose life for these kids.  It would have been very easy to chose otherwise.  In the end, she was unable to provide for them herself.  As we sat down with her, she shared her heart and what she knew she had to do for her children.
Trying to keep it all together, she sat with us in a private room and told us she was now willing to have us be her kids' parents forever.  She wanted these four to be together forever without the risk of the state choosing otherwise.  What do you say to a mom whose heart is breaking?  I could not feel her pain, but I did feel sorry for her hurt.  
Both the bio mom and dad spent time with their lawyers and then stood before the judge to make their decision final.  Friend, that is not an easy thing, nor should it be.  There is a litany of questions presented to them to make sure that this is a personal decision they know is forever.  There was no going back.  
I will not forget their faces as the bio parents walked out of the courtroom.  Alone.  No longer rightful parents.  Oh my heart!  I still feel it as I write this a week later.  
It was all done before lunch.  Finished.  "Parental rights terminated."
We had asked God for this.  Many friends and family around the world were praying diligently for God's will be clear.  So then, why did I fell numb?  Was it the process of loss that reached deep into my heart?  I had a cordial relationship with this mom.   Now, my heart hurt even more for her. My prayer became more, "Lord, now that she is at the bottom, without anything, may she look up to you and realize you are all she needs."  

As we made the news public, FB exploded and we were thankful we had unlimited texting.  It was an exciting day to say the least.  We now saw a light at the end of this long tunnel.  April is the goal date for our adoption day where we will offically be a familly of ten.  

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