Life Today

This afternoon my mind drifted back to beautiful, quiet moments with Bryan on an island cruise vacation that ended just shy of two weeks ago.  Life is anything but beautiful and quiet today.  But, you may say, that’s what you signed up for with eight kids.  True.  Baseball schedules, play practices, orthodontic appointments, youth group activities, not to mention school all keep me perpetually moving.  What I am praying for is a more enjoyable chaos.  Is that even possible?  I believe it is, but I have not achieved that today.
Sunday night we had a few moments as we headed out to batting practice.  I even had a really good hit, if I do say so myself.  Actually the boys gave me credit.  That's worth something.  But, how I wish that when I am home in the day to day stuff, we could have more joy.  More concern for others.  More diligence.  More peace.  More quiet words.
I speak for myself.
My family is far from the norm, yet there is no mistake that God has intentionally brought us all together.  Sadly,  many, many days are too full of anger, defiance, and deceit.  I wish there was some magic button, wishing wand, special pill to take that would heal our hearts, allow us to trust, show us how to love so much more.
Thank you God, that you hear my pleas for peace.  Thank you, Lord, that you have not left me hanging today.  Thank you that there is no condemnation because I am held in your hand.  Please show me how to intentionally love my children in ways that do not make sense.  Help me to put aside my desires and what I feel are rights as their mother, to allow you to work through me to reach their hearts.  Thank you, Lord, that you have such amazing plans for my children.  I don’t want to be the wall that keeps them from seeing you today.